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Do you measure up to the expectations of others? Do you measure up to the expectations of YOUR-SELF? I don’t always. But I have decided that I’m freeing myself from…myself. Or, at least I’m trying to. Warning. I might vent a little in this post. I feel like I have a few things to say. So, here it goes. #therapysession
Lately, I have been feeling more “aware”. Aware of the fact that I have spent too many years of my life concerned about what others think. I have given too much energy to silently comparing myself to others to see how I measured up. I am entirely too critical of myself, and I am not giving myself enough credit for being me. For whatever reason, these thoughts have felt very heavy to me in recent months. It’s physically weighing me down. I mean, I bring good things to the world of those around me, right? I’m a good human being, right? I’m worthy of good things, right? Right???
Mind you, this is coming from a fairly self-confident individual who shows no outward appearance of any insecurity. And honestly, I do feel I am a confident person. While I am fully aware that there is no such thing as perfection and we all have issues to deal with, I have never felt that my issues were bad enough to complain about. Thankfully, I live a pretty decent life. So, what’s up with me lately?
Maybe it’s because I’m getting a bit older? I just turned 46 a few days ago. Not old, for sure…and I feel like I’m just getting started. Maybe this is the beginning of that start. Me being aware of the power I have given to the thoughts I have of what others think of me. Why do I care how others will perceive me if I don’t “measure up”? What am I trying to measure up to anyway? Society’s definition of “good enough”? Not sure. But it needs to stop…now.
Social Media is NOT All Good
Social media does NOT help the situation. We all know this, right? Social media puts us in a situation where we are comparing our every day lives to the “highlight reels” of others. I know that I sure as heck do not post the following to Facebook:
“Hey everyone and Happy Thursday! Guess what?!?!?! I just got into a HUGE fight with my husband and my kids are working every nerve that I have today! I gained three pounds last week…AND my hair is falling out. Oh, and did I mention we don’t have enough money in the bank to cover the bills this month? Yay me! #winning #liveyourbestlife #blessed”.
Can you imagine? I’m laughing at the thought! I wonder what would happen if we were all super honest on social media for a day? A week? A month? No filters. Just brutal honesty. That would be quite a sight to see!
I am unique, and that’s a beautiful thing.
Another thing that I know for sure is that there is only one of me. Just one. I am an individual. I am unique. So why am I trying to be like everyone else? Why have I EVER thought that was okay? I mean, it’s a GREAT thing to be inspired by others, using that inspiration to propel yourself forward towards your goals. However, I will no longer measure myself and my successes and failures in life to that of anyone else. Its ridiculous and I have been guilty of this for too long. I’m done.
Have you seen the movie Wonder? If not, put it on your must-see list immediately. Tear-jerker alert! There is a line from that movie that is so applicable in this moment, and it is as profound as it is simple. The line is “Why are you trying to fit in when you were meant to stand out?”. Mind. Blown. Why do we do this to ourselves?
Reality check time.
So what if I gain or lose weight? And, guess what else…my hair IS thinning like crazy and I don’t know what to do about it! My husband and children DO work every nerve that I have. Every. Single. One. To the point that I just want to runaway sometimes, even though I love them with all of my heart. I was laid off from my last corporate position in January of this year, so finances are too tight for my liking and I’m not sure what to do about it. I have three freaking college degrees, and I’m unemployed with no prospects in the works. What the heck? My skin still breaks out like I’m fifteen freaking years old! I’m not as organized as I’d like to be. I really wish I could be a better person, in general. Honestly. I’m feeling a little “lost” these days.
But…at least I am “aware”. I feel like this is a turning point in my life. I’ve always known I was created to do something great in this world, and maybe this is the beginning of that. Sometimes you have to be forced out of your comfort zone in order to realize greatness. I feel called to inspire others to believe in themselves, go after those dreams, crush the boundaries of their conformity boxes, and live their best lives. Maybe that starts with me doing just that. If I live my truth, that can potentially inspire others to do the same.
I’m going to do what I want to do.
I started this blog as a means to communicate things that I love with others. Travel, food, positive mindset, life in general…and more travel. 🙂 But then I read somewhere along the way that I had to narrow my blog down to my “niche market”. And from a marketing perspective, I see the value in that. But now I am saying…screw it! I am going to write about my life. The ups, the downs, and all of the “in-betweens”. I’m not doing this for SEO purposes. Not doing this for massive financial gain. Not doing this because anyone else said I should.
I am doing this for me. And for anyone who chooses to read it. Because I have a voice to share. Because I hope to be a light in someone else’s world. Maybe I can make someone laugh along the way. I want to say that it’s okay to be you. You don’t have to be anyone else, and you don’t have to measure up to anyone else’s expectations. Be the best “you” that you can be, and forget the rest. Put a muzzle on those negative voices in your life. They are lying to you anyway. Find your truth. YOUR truth.
Do You Measure Up to the Expectations?
The truth is…probably not. And that’s okay. There is nothing wrong with setting high expectations and goals. Having something to work towards is a great thing. As long as we honestly do the best we can to be the best we can be, there’s really nothing else to fret about. But don’t beat yourself up when you aren’t who everyone else says you need to be. Who were you created to be? What is your purpose? I’m still working on that, but at least I’m aware.
Well, now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, I think I have some work to do. Stick around, because I am just getting started…
Crushing the stereotypical,